Um, about yesterday's post...
Ah, that was a great rant yesterday, wasn�t it? It is true that those totally pissed off PMS rants get the best response. I think this entry is going to be all follow up to that post.
Oh, and, that douchebag Aunt Flo did not show up yesterday as I thought she would. Now she�s just being a bitch. Like she knows I know she�s there and she�s hiding out.
I even had sex with Hub the night before last (although you�d have never guessed that from my obvious, seething animosity toward him in yesterday�s post) hoping that�d bring her on. Well, of course, that�s not the only reason. I was horny, dammit. I might not be able to stand him half the time, but he�s still good in the sack.
Yes, Amy , he needs meds for ADD. If I wasn�t convinced before yesterday that he has it, I am now. And get this!!! GET THIS!!! While I was on here yesterday, bitching up a storm about his retarded ness, he was out getting some estimates done for the business. He had his little clipboard, pencil and pad of paper and wrote up these estimates for me to type up on the computer. I�m sure I�ve mentioned in the past how aggravating his little handwritten shit drives me nuts. Yesterday? You should have seen these things. Neat, organized, for the most part the way I like things listed and, AND, almost NO spelling errors. And the spelling errors that were on there were silly ones (�bedes� instead of �beds�, for example).
He�s not as fucking illiterate as he�d like to say he is. In fact, he�s not illiterate at all. He did graduate from high school (like that means he�s not illiterate). And, I might mention, he graduated from high school while working full time to support his first wife (who didn�t work) and his young son Butthead. Stupid people don�t do that kind of shit, especially not at 18 years old.
So, I looked at him and said, �Look at this. This is almost perfect. You CAN do this stuff, you just have to pay attention and apply yourself�. And not be lazy about it. It�s easier to just ask me, instead of taking a whole 20 seconds to figure it out himself. Like, last night he wanted to order subs for dinner. He likes this one particular place in town that makes their own pita bread (and this stuff is so damn delicious, holy crap. Beavis thinks it�s not cooked enough, but damn, some things taste great half cooked and this bread is one of them). Anyway, he opened the phone book and started asking me, �What�s the name again?�. I know he knows, he�s ordered from there plenty of times when I�m not around and I refused to do it for him. It then took him maybe a second to find the place in the book.
And for Cheri (if you click her name, go give her shit and ask her to update, dammit!!!) and Caela (her, too!), here�s the recipe for the dip. It�s really easy. You need some refried beans, sour cream, salsa and shredded cheddar cheese and a dish to cook it in. I use a 9 inch glass pie plate. Spread a layer of beans on the bottom, then layer some sour cream, then salsa, then top it with a nice thick layer of cheese. I cook it at 350 degrees for 20 minutes or so. Oh my god, so good. And, I use lowfat sour cream and cheese, and nonfat refried beans and it�s still just as good. It�s even funner the next day with the gas it causes. Worth ever stinkin� butt blast.
My mood is so much better today and I credit my shopping spree last night for that. Old Navy has no idea what hit them. Actually, that makes it sound like I spent way more than I did. I got two pairs of capris, one of which is white and I really had to debate myself over that (me+white=stain me, baby!!!), but I ended up getting them anyway. One pair of jeans (low waist, boot cut, �vintage� wash, these are my jeans from the fifth grade, I swear), two striped polo shirts, one solid pink one, and two v-neck tees. Oh, and a really cool pair of flip flops. It was wonderful to be there with no kids, free to browse as long as I friggin� wanted to. I was in there for an hour and a half (total spent: $131.50). They had crap for jackets, though, so I had to go to Wally World after (�had to�, right) and found a cheap ($17.92) but cute jean jacket there. I haven�t owned a jean jacket since roughly 1990 or so, but it�s cute. Other than that, all WW has for jackets are things my grandmother would have liked, rest her soul. (No offense, Memere, but I�m not ready to start dressing like you just yet. I know when you were here we wore the same size and sometimes you gave me some of your stuff, but I went and did Weight Watchers and lost a bunch of weight and I got too thin for it so I gave it all to Debbie that works at the credit union and she really likes it, anyway).
And regarding the �PIMP� on the back of the shed, because I�ve gotten a few comments about that ( Imadad2 and Jennifer , if anyone else did, I'm sorry I forgot to link you, too!). I confirmed it Tuesday, it was Beavis. He said he just did it recently, like a week or two ago. If it wasn�t so damn funny, I�d be pissed. But, it is funny. It so does not belong there. And now the Brazilians in the red house next door will have to look at that all the time.
I noticed that some people reply to the comments that people leave in their comments. I haven�t done it yet, although I�d like to start. I just feel kind of vain expecting people to check my comments after they leave them. But I know of certain people that do and I check them, so fuck it, I�m going to start. Because you people crack my ass right up, and sometimes I�m sitting here talking back to you and what the hell good is that? First, you can�t hear me, and second, um, that�s like crazy old lady stuff, talking to yourself.
Is there any proper etiquette covering the replying to comments?
That was a funny sentence, because, really, is there etiquette on the internet at all? Or anywhere anymore, for that matter?
Anyway, my friend Smokey is on the way over. He�s bringing me some �Wet Mango� blunt tubie thingies per my request, and we are going to toke up, dude!
Oh yeah, that reminds me. We still have �Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle� from Bl0ckbuster 0nline. I hate to send it back, and I when I do, I�m going to pick up my own copy of it. Fucking funny ass movie. I gave it to Beavis to watch and now me and the boys walk around the house quoting the shit out of it. They love the Freakshow part, so everything is �I�ll get you fixed right up in a jiffy� followed by whatever the fuck that guy does after it, like a Tourette�s spasm or whatever. We�ve been over this a billion times, and still I sit here laughing about it. Beavis was talking about it yesterday, how funny it was, and he couldn�t come up with anything specific at the time, he was just laughing thinking about it, which got me laughing. Oh, and both the boys are referred to by me as �Vagina McGinestein�. �Hey McGinestein, telephone!�. I highly recommend this movie, but only if you are into laughing a lot. I could quote it all damn day. Best movie I�ve seen in a long time.
�What kind of hippie am I? I�m a BUSINESS hippie, I understand the laws of supply and demand�.
I must stop myself now, or I could just keep going and going like the fucking energizer bunny.
Alrighty then! Ciao!
PS: I just saw in Yahoo news that Terri Schiavo just died. RIP, Terri. You're in a much better place now. And wasn't it nice of Yahoo to put up that pretty pic of you? I am so sorry about the way your life ended, the way it was all up for public display, that wasn't right. Hopefully it wasn't all for nothing.