Steak and Cheese
Hub has disappeared for a few hours, leaving me maybe sometime to update without anything but the usual kiddo interruptions.
I�m making up my CD wish list. I have to get some classics in my CD collection and there are some must-haves that I don�t have.
First and foremost, Guns �n Roses �Appetite For Destruction�. Can you believe I don�t have that one? That and �Lies�, but that�s not as high on the priority list. Anything after that, I don�t get into by them. I was sick of their new stuff and by �92 couldn�t stand them. �November Rain�--blech! But gimmee some �Mr. Brownstone� any day of the week.
Second, Stone Temple Pilots �Core�. Damn that�s a good CD. Why do I not have this yet?
Third is a bunch. Led Zeppelin�s 1 through 4 (with heavy emphasis on 2 and 3), �Physical Graffiti� and �Houses of the Holy�. That�s a start for Zep, which was my favorite band growing up. I did a lot of damage to my eardrums with them. I used to love Jimmy Page, LOVED him. I used to write �Jimmy Page is God!� all over the place. And that book, �Hammer of the Gods�? Read it over and over.
Fourth is a guilty pleasure. AC/DC. I think �Back in Black�, but if they have a greatest hits, I�d settle for it. Every time I catch them on the radio in the car, I crank them. And I have a preference for Brian Johnson AC/DC over Bon Scott AC/DC. Brian has that killer heavy metal voice, ya know? Cuz I�m baaaaack, baaaaaaaaack, back in black�blah, blah, blah.
That�s as far as I�ve gotten. And I�ve been making this list for a year. I think too I should have Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young on there, �So Far� and �D�j� Vu�. Oh! And The Beatles, �Abbey Road� is a must. The White Album too. And Revolver.
Okay, I really need to stop now.
Have I mentioned what a piece of work my husband is? Maybe once or twice right? Yeah. That stupid truck of his? Wasn�t just a broken u-joint, he broke the fucking axle.
Now, I need to mention that he just got that truck in May. We bought it off a guy that was a member of the credit union. This guy had the truck for like 4 years and supplied us with a list of all the maintenance that he�d had done in that time. This truck was taken care of. Of course, the guy is a software engineer (and a smoking hot babe, born the day before me--stuff you learn working at the credit union--on the day Jimi died. Divorced, successful, only one kid and owns his own home. Where the fuck was he when I was single, I want to know) and didn�t use the truck like Hub does. But still. WTF?
I let him drive the van in the midst of my hangover the other day, and he hit every fucking pothole we went by. Not too mention, I don�t know how the fuck he doesn�t hit anything on the side of the road because he rides well over the white line. Maybe that has something to do with the broken side mirror on the passenger side of the truck?
Yeah, right, you can drive with sight in one eye only. Bullshit. He can�t, anyway. If you�re ever in my state, watch out for reddish 1999 Dodge Rams. Just watch out. Unless I�m behind the wheel. Then it�s okay. But if some dark haired guy with a jarhead haircut and a goatee is behind the wheel, just assume it�s my husband and get the fuck away from him. Fast.
Chief Black Cloud. Yah. Chief Fucking Major Accident Waiting to Happen is more like it.
And then there�s Beavis. What would an entry of mine be without Beavis�s news du jour, right? Yah. We got a call last night from his one of his buddy�s parents. They�re nice people, but a bit uptight. You know, they go to church and all, and Beavis was just able to get them to download AIM on their computer so they could chat, which took a lot of talking them into it. Uptight, like a lot of parents now.
Anyway. So they called to say they�d caught their kid checking out some porn website and the kid told them that Beavis showed him how to get there. WTF? So I asked Beavis about it this morning and he�s playing dumb. I�m all okay with him checking that shit out, for the most part, because I did the same thing at his age (okay, back then it was movies and magazines, but still), but I�m not okay with him hooking his friends with uptight parents up. Because as far as I�m concerned, all his friends� parents are uptight. And this is what I told him, and he says he doesn�t know why his buddy said that, so I said, look into it.
I checked his username on the computer (because I have the password!!), and he has some questionable shit there. Yesterday he did google searches for �nude wwemen� (love that spelling, ey!) and �porn�, and then there�s this website called steak and cheese that I�ve seen before that�s kinda questionable, you know, if I were uptight I wouldn�t be too keen on it. They use the F word and shit.
I don�t know. I figure, he�s going to look at that shit anyway. How much porn can you get online without anteing up some cash? He knows about respecting women and I don�t think that�ll ever be an issue, so I�m not worried about the exploiting women part. I�m not into forbidding shit from the kids, they�re just going to go and do that shit anyway. And it�s natural. The poor kid has just hit puberty like you wouldn�t believe, peach fuzz on the upper lip and his voice is changing, so of course he�s curious. And that�s okay. One thing that sucked when I was a kid is that sex was connoted as �bad�, and I had a lot of issues because of that. Cuz it�s not bad, but I had that Catholic fucking guilt thing over the fact that I was a little hornball and I don�t want that for my kids. I think I�ve been able to give him some good direction as far as it goes, and I really don�t think he�ll go out and act like that little fucker from the movie �Kids� or anything.
I�ve been over my three basic rules for teen behavior with him more than once. They are as follows:
Rule #1: Don�t drink and drive. Period. And don�t get into a car with someone who�s been drinking. Just don�t. Call me and I will pick you up (or I�ll call a cab if I�m drunk too). You won�t get in trouble, and I will commend you for being smart enough to call me instead of getting inside some death mobile. Of course, I�ll make fun of your drunk ass all the way home and guaranteed you�ll be up early the next morning, but you won�t get in trouble.
Rule #2: Don�t do cocaine, heroin, speed or anything addictive like that. Just don�t even go there. This is always followed by my stories about people I knew back then that got all fucked up. Like Marc, the guy who�s life was handed to him on a platter and he blew it all away, became a loser junkie and died of an OD in Vegas when he was 23 years old.
Rule #3: Wrap it up. All the time. Even if the chick says she�s on the pill. Wrap it up. Too embarrassed to buy rubbers? Put it on the shopping list. I�ll buy them for you. Of course, they�ll be colored and flavored and funky like that, but I�ll still buy them.
I�m feeling good today. I�ve only got Andrea�s kids (is it bad that I didn�t tell anyone else the Boston trip was postponed? Oh well, fuck it!), which is a nice light load. I feel so good, I can think about drinking again. That was a nasty hangover Sunday, but it was such a fun night.
Which, by the way, I don�t remember much of after like 11 pm, but I wish I did since a discussion between Hub and I regarding the night, especially the time I was hanging out with that guy J and Rhonda (taking pictures of his sexy self, too, I might add) elicited this comment from Hub, �I just don�t trust drunk guys around my wife when she�s drunk, too�. Smart move, Hub. I just wish I could remember what happened!
Anyway, he�s here. That means I probably have to go do something for him. Whoopee fuckin� doo.
Ciao.