"You must have eaten, like, a hundred bucks worth of pot, and, like, 30 bucks worth of shrooms man".
Good gracious, in all the excitement of the first day of school yesterday, I completely spaced that it was the 5th anniversary of Mickey�s heart defect diagnosis. It�s as notable as his birthday and the date of his surgery (9/29/2000).
Yeah, five years ago yesterday, I took a trip up to Manchester to visit a cardiologist to check on what I truly believed to be an �innocent� heart murmur. Minnie was in tow as well, she was all of 18 months old. I walked in there with zero knowledge of heart defects and expected to walk out with a clean bill of health. What happened in the few hours there was one of the most devastating events that ever happened to me with my kids.
Not only did I find out that he was NOT fine, he had a very complicated heart defect that would need surgery and was showing signs of congestive heart failure AND I was expected to check him into either Dartmouth Hitchcock way the fuck up north, or Boston Children�s, way the fuck in Boston, THAT DAY. (Even though Dartmouth is further away, I chose it because I�d be driving in the 5pm hour and did not want to deal with Boston traffic. Now I wish I�d chosen Boston first, because he had his surgery there and they were AMAZING. Dartmouth was okay, but I felt lost there and got very little direction from the staff. But I digress). Beavis was 9 and had just started school that same day and I wasn�t home when he got back from school because I was tied up at the doctors. Thank God my dad just happened to be there and was able to watch him.
A warning now. This next picture is safe, but the one under it may be disturbing. Just so you know.
Here�s how Mickey looked three days after we returned home from our 5 day stay at Dartmouth. He was very sick. He looked grey (which is actually the �blue� that they refer to in heart patients, but I found him to be grey), and skinny, and much like an old man. Me, I just look fat:
Here�s the disturbing one. Mickey just an hour or so out of surgery on 9/29/2000. I�m telling ya, you just haven�t lived until you�ve seen your baby like this:
By that time, I knew what to expect, because upon my return home from Dartmouth, I began researching everything I could about heart defects and surgeries and everything related. The first time I saw a picture of a baby post-surgery, I cried my eyes out at the thought of my baby looking that way. But, I continued on and saw lots of pictures of babies like that. It made it much easier to look at him when he was out of surgery. I mean, check it out, I took pictures! And I�m so glad that I did.
Of course, here�s how the little fucker looks now:
Anyway, onward and upward.
I wanted to write about Butthead. Honestly, he and Hilda have me at my wit�s end. I get so fed up with their fucking bullshit. I try to be understanding, but lying and stealing and shit? No tolerance for it.
Butthead worked with Hub�s nephew Joey last week. Okay, let�s make that �worked�. What they did do was drive around and probably smoke weed. I have no concrete proof that Butthead smokes, but I�m pretty fucking sure. I know for a fact that Joey does, but whatever, he�s 21 years old. Anyway, they come back Thursday and Friday saying they worked 7-6 both days, yet nothing got done. Hub sent them out to another job to get some equipment, and they were gone for hours and returned with no equipment. They were to clean up at the orthodontist�s office that we do, and they made a bigger mess than there was before they got there.
Hub came home and confronted Butthead, which resulted in Butthead giving all these excuses about not having gas and their phones didn�t work, yadda yadda yadda, and have I said how much I hate stupid excuses? Yeah. So it ended with Butthead saying, �It�s not MY business!�. Yeah, but you�re getting paid to do a job, retard king. Anyway, I decided right then and there, I�ll never cut a check for that little moron ever again. He can go work for someone else and learn what it�s really like to have a jobby job.
He wanted his girlfriend to come over the same night and we said no. He said, �Even though you told me yesterday she could�. Yup, there ya go, asshat. Like when you told us you�d mow the lawn, but then lied about why you didn�t? Yeah, like that.
Then Saturday night, he wanted to go to a party. Hub said fine, but you�re in at 11:30. All of a sudden, the little motherfucker wants to go to Mommy�s for the weekend. Yeah, Mommy, that white trash toothless scumbag form hell. Why don�t you pack the fuck up and move there if she�s going to cover your lying little ass for you? He actually told Hub he wanted to move out, but not to his mom�s, to his friend�s house. YAH. See why I think he�s smoking weed? Or crack?
Now, every time he bitches about something (and trust me that kid can bitch like no woman I�ve ever met) I just say, �oh, it�s not MY problem�. He came home from school bitching that he has one class that�s all freshmen, and one that�s all sophomores. He�s a big bad junior now, dontcha know? But he flunked Health in 9th grade and English last year, so he has to take them over. �This year is going to SUCK�. Idiot. I said, �It�s your own fault�. And he kept bitching, so I decided to go with �It�s not MY problem�. He is so irritating!
Then there�s Hilda. She came up this weekend, whining and moaning, her mom hadn�t gotten her any school clothes yet. My problem? I think not. Everyone within earshot got to hear about poor little Hilda and her mean mean mommy. Which is just a bullshit ploy to get herself more shit. This is the same shit that got her moved back in with her mom two years ago. She whined that we weren�t treating her right, she was so neglected, and her mom fed into it and all this shit happened�yadda yadda yadda. Guess what! Homey don�t play dat! Stay in your mom�s house where she neglects you. She puts up with your lying and stealing way better than I will. Bitch.
And yesterday, Hub took her to counseling. (Yeah, little Miss �My Mommy never takes me to the doctor�--just like we didn�t, right--and we get her into counseling and she doesn�t want to go. This chick is impossible to make happy, so why try). All the fucking counselor�s concerns were that Hub and I argue and it makes her uncomfortable (then stay the fuck home) and she couldn�t understand why she ALWAYS had to go to work with him (she had to go to work with him two days this summer, TWO FUCKING DAYS, because I had shit to do and we can�t trust her in the house alone). Fucking drama queen. Feel sorry for me! Not.
I hate that I can�t stand those two, but it�s like shoveling shit against the tide. It�s just one thing after another. I know my kids aren�t angels, I�ll be the first to admit it and anyone who reads this knows that, but they haven�t given Hub half the amount of bullshit that his kids have. Specifically those two. And I try to understand where they�re coming from.
I�m not perfect, but one thing that my kids have always had is a stable home with one parent. Beavis doesn�t know what it�s like to live with anyone but me. Butthead and Hilda were born into a very volatile relationship and have bounced back and forth between parents. Hub hasn�t been blameless at all, he moved from Shauna to Helen very quickly, then from Helen to this other broad Chrissy (who ODed on sleeping pills with Butthead right there, to Hub�s credit he ended it with her right then and there) and from her to me. Shauna however has been through men like regular women go through underwear. And when Shauna has a man, they live together. Fuck that dating bullshit, let�s move right in. To her credit, she�s been with Howard for about 2 � years now.
Anyway, I suppose I should stop and think about that before I get all bullshit at them. This is one of the things I vaguely remember speaking with Helen about on Scorpion Bowl night. It�s just so fucking difficult. There is more to the picture with Butthead, something that happened with him and Beavis three years ago, that I�ve never mentioned, that we dealt with but it�s always there in the back of my mind.
Step kids. Can�t live with them, can�t throw them out of the car on the side of the road.
Life has been fucking great without the kids home all day. Mickey and I have been dealing with it okay. Plus, Colin and Makayla were only here Monday this week, and next week they won�t be here at all. Their parents are getting married on Saturday. (I�m sorry, but it�s irresistible to me, like the way I have to say �moo!� when I see cows, to say �Mommy and Daddy are getting married!� at any wedding where parents are finally getting married. And I�ve been to four of those weddings in the past two years). Of course, it hasn�t been just me and him. Yesterday, Hub came home due to rain. Today, Nina called me to ask if I could watch the kids so she could go to a prenatal appointment.
Oh yeah. Nina. Like I said, stories will abound when they�re moved in. Holy frickin� moley.
Okay, I need to post this now so I can catch up on diaries before the kids start coming home from school. One hour from now.
Sayonara!