A cigarette pressed between her lips but I'm staring at her tits it's the wrong way
I wrote this last week when the internets was down. I just read it again, it's kind of funny.
Thursday 5/4/06
Hi, my name is Jackie and I live in the House of Ass. I'm married to Hub, who is the King of Ass, despite being a halfway decent guy. Today, Hub took his head out his ass. Briefly. He took it out long enough to know that the rain of the past few days is gone and it's time to go back to work. He even woke up super early, without my assistance, which is usually a good sign that he has safely removed his head from his ass.
That lasted a full five minutes. Well, maybe not "full". He took his truck and trailer down to his usual dumping spot. His attempt to "cover up" the trrash that's down there ("trash" being old washing machines, big riding toys, kiddie pools, etc), according to him. Secretly, I know it's just an easy place for him to dump shit. ANYWAY!!!! He backs that trailer up dangerously close to the edge of the "hill" he's created out of leaves, grass, mulch, etc (ie; NOT FRICKIN' STURDY GROUND) and this time, finally, he got stuck.
*moron* is the only word that came to my mind. He came in the house all bent out of shape, but I wasn't up for hearing it. Not my problem. Sounds harsh, but I've been waiting for him to either get stuck or lose the trailer down there all spring. He wouldn't have half the friggin problems he does were it not for, oh, um, HIMSELF.
Anyway. He called the tow guy and got pulled out for the low, low price of $100. Why it only costs like $70 to tow a dead truck all the way to the shop and why it costs $100 to pull a working truck out of a tough spot is beyond me. Although most likely the extra cost is an idiot fee. Hub is quite familiar with those.
Yeah. So. What else is happening in the House of Ass? Well, my lack of an online presence has been due to no internets. Which is fucking killing me! Aaargh! Monday afternoon I sat down and tried to hook up the wireless router *properly* and done fucked it all up, now neither computer has internets. This has been an issue. Dammit. Hub had a buddy come over last night to look at it, and he thinks that our modem has done up and died. Which makes sense, since we've had the same one since we moved here in July 2002. That's just about four years old, which is ancient in computer years, I guess. Computer Buddy Guy (who, fyi, was cute and so not geeky) called it "old school". Ha ha. Anyway, today I will be going to the cable company to trade it in for the latest model. Since I'm a retard who rents the shit.
Also featured in the House of Ass, children who are so thick in the fucking head, they still don;t get the fact that they need to just stay the fuck away from the laptop. While I turned around to make Mickey's breakfast, Minnie started reading, "Hi, my name is Jackie and I live in...". Whoa! Stop right there, missy! Of course, once reprimanded, as she has been every stinking time I have the thing out, she cries like she didn't fucking know that she's not supposed to be near it. She'll just keep it up, too. If I leave it alone for a second, she's right at it, pretending to type on the keys and shit. Bitch, get your fucking hands off!
Beavis has been in DC since Tuesday. Haven't heard from him yet, which is fine. No news is good news. His first big boy trip far away without Mommy. I bought him four disposable cameras to make sure he took lots of pics. Now if I can get them developed, that'd be a bonus! I'm not so good with the developing of the pictures. Especially worse since I got a digital. My idea now of developing pictures is putting them on a disc.
Anyway, life goes on. This AM I am heading out to get my new modem, get a check for the rent since it's the fourth of the month already and heck! May as well pay it. I have to get a bank check, otherwise Hub will spend it all from underneath me. Pesky rent, don't cha know? But, myself, I'm kind of attached to the whole "having a roof over my head" thing. I know, I'm nuts!
Anyway, at the time of this writing, it is Thursday, May 4, at 8:25 AM. Hopefully, and with much luck (I'll fucking need it), I might be back online tonight. But, heh, I won't get my hopes up.
I'm out, yo. =)
Listening to: "Higher Ground" RHCP Currently reading: All the crap I missed after a week with no interweb access. Thinking about: I'm on the laptop! Online! And Mickey is playing on the other computer.