Lose my breath
If I had batteries for the digital camera, I�d take a pic of Mickey and post it here. He�s wearing his foam Woody cowboy hat from his Halloween costume, a baby blanket tied around his neck as a cape and his winter boots (spiderman, of course). This is over his lovely outfit of choice for today, bright orange �Whatever dude� Spongebob shirt and green and navy track pants. Priceless. The kid cracks my ass up.
We took the tribe out to see �The Incredibles� yesterday. Butthead didn�t want to come, being that he�s almost 16 and far too cool to go see �a Disney movie� (his words, and I just let him go on saying that, because it�s a Pixar movie, and I didn�t see the name Disney anywhere, and anyway, the friggin� kid will sit and watch Nickelodeon all day, he�s not too cool for that, and he saw �Finding Nemo� more than once, he wasn�t too cool for that. But I digress. A whole bunch). Hub wanted to make him come with us, but I wasn�t with that. Who wants to take a disgruntled asshole teenager along? So he can ruin our time? Fuck that shit. So we left his ass home, locked the bedroom door AND booby-trapped our room, just in case he could pick the lock (which I doubt. The lock on the bedroom door is one you�d put on the door to your house. We didn�t fuck around with that).
Anyway, I know why we never take the kids to the movies. It cost us $90 exactly. And it was a matinee!!! $40.50 for tickets, $49.50 for popcorn and drinks. More for food than to actually see the movie. Highway robbery, I tell you. �It�s just so ridiculous� (more Eddie Murphy, that�s him doing Ricky Ricardo from the �Comedian� tape. Yes, tape, because I bought the damn thing in 1984 or so, either right before the invention of CD�s or when they cost like a million dollars).
Expense aside, it was worth forking over the cash. What an awesome movie. I�m ready to go back today to see it again. I�m holding back from calling it Incredible, for obvious reasons, but it really was. I�m buying the DVD when it comes out. Go see it. Really. My favorite part was at the end, with the baby and the villain (I loved the villain. He was a diabolical little shit). Funny, funny, funny.
Anyway. Back to my little indiscretion Friday night. (I know, let it go, already, but I can�t. And won�t). Btw, Hub got laid again last night. That�s three times in two days. He�s like a kid in a candy store. Taking full advantage until I become �too tired� again. I know he�s wondering where this is all coming from.
The guilt thing, I think, I�m feeling because I�m supposed to. Like I�d be a bad wife if I didn�t feel guilty, at least. But. I haven�t stopped thinking about this guy, I sent him an offline message yesterday, he replied, I replied back�I read again our little conversation, which I saved, and I�ve peeked at his pic when no one else was around to see.
Yeah, I�m just begging for trouble, leaving this shit on the computer, but fortunately, Hub doesn�t know shit about this thing. I�ve mentioned before that he doesn�t get the difference between �Internet� and �email�. The ones I have to worry about are the boys. But we have Windows XP and different usernames, pass worded, etc, so they won�t be likely to find this.
However, I do believe in �never say never�. Anything could happen. Hub could find out. I doubt he�d leave me over it, but things would be ugly for a while. I�ll tell you what I�m NOT going to do, I�m not going to �fess up, cuz that�s just stupid. I�ll take my chances with not getting caught.
(Our landlord is this cute little Greek guy who is a major flirt--I found this out after I lost weight, btw. It turns out that a few years ago, he had himself a little affair that was juts eating him up. So he told his wife. Guess what happened? They�re in the process of a divorce after 25 years of marriage. When he told me that he fessed up I was like, �Dude, why? She had no clue and you TOLD her?�. Hello. Dummy. I told Hub, if you ever do that and I don�t find out, just don�t tell me okay).
I don�t know what it is. I�ve got this great husband, who�s not perfect but what friggin� man is (and we all know I�m not perfect, thatsa for sure), and I just need to have the attention of other men. I�ve always been like this, but those years of being 100lbs overweight kind of put a damper on it. Then I lost the weight, and it�s like I was held captive inside all that fat for so long, I felt like I just got out of prison or something. Men look at me. I love it. Hub notices other guys looking at me when we go out and doesn�t know how to handle it. All too often he says, �I�m just waiting for you to leave me�, like someone else would be better for me or something. So, perhaps he has half a clue about my inner desire for the attention of other men. Or maybe he�s just insecure. Who knows. There�s a reason, however, that I will only go out to the bar with him, because I would get into trouble with a little alcohol in me. I�m trampy like that.
I wished to be married all through my single years, and now that I�m married, I wish to be single. It�s an endless circle. I�ll stick with the being married thing for as long as it lasts, even though I�m wondering if I might be hellbent on destroying it on some unconscious level. I�ll just live vicariously through others (like Chickpea, who I�m insanely jealous of, with her escapades and her stable) and have my little online fling.
Face it, I�m going to hell. That�s where all the cool people go anyway, so at least I�ll be in good company.
OH, and then last night, Hub and I were watching ourselves some CMT and Gretchen Wilson, my new hero, was on. He starts talking about how much she reminds him of �Dee�, a woman who was a teacher at the kids� daycare. He volunteered a lot there last winter and hung out with Dee a lot, she used to call him and talk about her problems with her man. And I had a feeling she had the hots for him, but I didn�t have any issue with that. He was just tickled that he could have a chick friend and I was okay with it, as Esther had major jealousy issues that I think were pretty traumatic to him (as Dick�s were traumatic to me). Anyway, he told me last night that Dee just up and told him once that if it weren�t for me, she�d be with him. (He�d have gone for her, she was a mess. He likes his women like that. Crazy). I think Hub was planning on me getting upset, but I was cool with it. I kinda like it when other women want my man. He�s too fucking faithful to do anything about it.
Spellchecker can be so rude sometimes. I feel like it�s my 8th grade English teacher, correcting my every little itty bitty mistake. It didn�t even like �spellcheck�, it wanted to change it to �spellchecker�. Man. Get off my back. I know, I can turn it off, but that�d be one less thing to annoy me, and one less thing to bitch about.
Anyway, I promised the little bastards some BK before OPK show up, so I�m off.
See you in hell! (It�s okay, we�ll all be there, it�ll be fun!)
PS: I don't know what the hell is up with that link to
Chickpea , stupid d-land. Hopefully this one'll work. Dammit.