Life's a ball.
OMFG. I am so getting on board with Hub�s accountant and reforming the way he is doing this billing shit. He is driving me nuts. Two bills and two estimates, you�d think it�d be simple, ey? NO!
I won�t even go into the horrendous spelling. I�m teaching how to use MS Word with spellchecker because I can�t do up a bill on what he gives me without going over it with him. And he doesn�t understand the way Quickbooks works, and he�s fucking up the pricing. Do I really need four different items for loam? No.
My biggest bitch? Names and addresses. He can�t get them right. I won�t do shit until I have a correct name and address. I was just doing a bill for an address that he just had down as �45 Gardner�. No �Street� or �Drive� or �Lane�, etc. So I go to my trusty Yahoo Maps to find out that there is no �Gardner� anything in that town, just a �Garden Dr�. So I called him to ask about it.
�I call the street Gardner�. I don�t give a crap. That�s not the name of it. It�s fucking �Garden�, and I made him drive over to check it out and that�s what it is. His crappy attention to details is driving me nuts. He thinks it�s a little thing, but I don�t. I�m the one who looks like a moron.
Like, he does work for the next town over. The guy he works for is named �Gerry�. But I didn�t know this for months, as Hub had given me the name �Greg�. So I�m billing fucking Greg, when it�s really Gerry. Who looks like an ass? Me, because he handed Hub a card and said, �Tell your wife that my name is Gerry�.
Never mind the fact that I�ve got five kids here, one of whom is a very mobile baby, and he wants me to fuck with this shit now. Sorry. I�d rather write in my diary. It�s easier and funner and way less irritating. And I can vent!
Oh yeah, I�m giving up this babysitting gig by next summer. No way I can do this and books for a full-fledged business. I�ll lose my shit. I am now, as it is. This goddamn Christmas tree is making me insane, trying to keep this fucking baby away from it. And the kids and their arguing! Holy shit! Little kids looking to make problems. WTF?
�You�re a girl�
�No, I�m not!�
�Yes, you are!�
�Mommy, she keeps saying I�m a girl!�
Like that�s gonna make you a girl, kid.
Well, it�s gonna be a short day today, anyway. Andrea�s picking up her kids for 1:00 and Rayanne has said she�s getting out of work early, too. That would be nice.
Tonight I�m taking the kids out to look at Christmas lights. I love to do that. A few streets over, there�s a guy who goes balls-out every year. He lives on a country road like we do, only you get to his house and it looks like goddamned Las Vegas. We drive by all the time. So that�s the plan for tonight. So if the other kids go home early, supper will be early and we can go out earlier. Of course, being that�s how I�m planning it, it won�t quite work out that way.
Blah, blah, blah. I�m just bitchy today.
Oh, but I did take note of the following conversation between Hub and Butthead last night. (I�ve been trying to make a habit of writing this shit down so I don�t forget the good stuff).
They were bullshitting about sex, I think (Hub is way open with Butthead about it), and Hub shared that old philosophy �if it smells like fish, it�s a dish, if it smells like cologne, leave it alone� and Butthead goes, �Why would it smell like cologne?� and Hub said, �You don�t want to know. That�s why you just leave it alone� and Butthead just gave a quick �Okay!� and that was it.
Poor kid. Aren�t you supposed to learn this shit from your friends, not your parents? He�s said that more than once.
I�m so fucking boring today. I do have a good story planned, and perhaps if I do get rid of the kids early, I may sit down and write it. About Smokey and how I used him for a dating service for quite a while. But for now, I must return to the joy of bookkeeping.
Don�t hate. Someday it could be you. Unless, of course, you�re one of the ones who read this for birth control! Which, btw, cracks my ass up. I know people in real life who�ve told me that I�m good birth control. I feel good that I�m providing a valuable service toward keeping the population down, especially since I�ve done my share of damage to the overpopulation problem.
Gotta go. Bah-bye!