TICKETMASTER=SATAN
Fucking Ticketmaster. Fucking satanic motherfuckers. Yey, I just wasted 40 minutes of my fucking life for NOTHING! I had fucking GA tickets, HAD them goddamnit, and there was �an error processing your request�. WTF? So I tried and tried again and fucking NOTHING. They even added a new date, and I tried my fucking ass off for that one too. And I didn�t get my fucking goddamn tickets.
No wonder Pearl Jam hated Ticketmaster so much. Fucking Nazis, I say.
Anyway, I AM going to that fucking show. I just have to find some fucking scalper type place to jack me hard for them. Damn. That was a fucking disappointment. Especially when I HAD fucking tickets, man! I HAD them.
Anyway. Enough of that shit. Suffice it to say I�m bullshit.
Let�s see if I can get myself into a better mood. Let�s recap yesterday, shall we?
Well, ya know, it was one of those days. Up and down with the mood. Cabin fever hitting hard. Thoughts of The Douchebag and Mickey�s heart stuff. And the fact that Hub and I have been way too snippy with each other, and adding to that his frequent absence from the house. Kids driving me nuts. All of them. The baby has this new thing, where I can�t leave the room (ie; to take a fucking piss) without his freaking the fuck out. Which in itself isn�t so bad, it�s the other kids� reaction to it. �He�s crying for you!�, �He needs a bottle!�. Then there�s just dealing with the girls fucking screeching and arguing and in general making me batty. Oh, and the lack of pins or even the opportunity to go upstairs and hit the new glass pipe for a minute.
So, I was in a good mood, then in a bad mood. Around about four o�clock, I could feel the meltdown brewing. You know how you can just feel it coming on. I called Hub, I needed to vent it out before I freaked. Of course, he can�t just lend an ear, he has to come up with his super stupid solution--get rid of all the kids. Like these people aren�t depending on me or anything, right? I was like, can�t you just listen to me? I need to get this off my chest. I started to cry, so I left the room and went into the bathroom so the kids wouldn�t see. Of course, what happens then, the fucking baby starts flipping out. And the kids are all up in his face, I could hear it. And that�s when I fucking lost it. I punched the wall (cuz, you know, that always makes everything better) and just screamed. Right into Hub�s ear.
So, yeah, in case you didn�t know, I�m out of my mind. Pyscho pre-PMS cabin fever bitch from hell. You know, just in case I�ve left that out before.
Then Hub comes through. He said, instead of him going out to pick up Hilda (a nice 45 minute ride round trip), he was sending me. He knew I needed out. So he came home, gave me a few minutes to go get all lit up, and I packed up my Cds and headed off to get Hilda.
Just what the doctor ordered. I picked up Butthead from wrestling after, and came home, dropped them off, then went to the credit union and picked up Katie for the party. We came here, had a beer and waited for Andrea and Denise (that�ll be Andrea�s girl�s nickname). Oh and I prepared a wonderful coconut blunt just for us.
So the girls showed up and we headed out to the party.
And what a party it was. I�d go as far as to call it a �shindig�. The demonstrations were great, quite funny and made me a bit moist as they described this shit. Move over Partylite, I have found my new favorite direct marketing company. Ladies, if you ever get invited to an Athena�s party , GO!
They had comedians from Boston. They were funny, too. They had food. They had penis pencils! There were more than 50 people there.
I ordered early, to get it over with. I ended up with Mr. Natural , because he just turned my ass on. Problem is, he had to be ordered, so I couldn�t take him home. =(
But I regretted ordering so early, because I was unawares of this lovely product which I now want. For Hub. And me. The stuff the girls said you can do with it, holy fucking crap. Use while you�re giving head, you can take your mouth off and he�ll never know you stopped. Oh yeah. Plus it provides lots of SUCTION.
Anyway. The stripper. �Rocko�. He was on last. Andrea spotted him first in the kitchen and came back to report she�d seen him. My first question to her, �Is he taller than you?� (Andrea is like 4�11�). Her answer, �No�. Big smile. �Are you fucking serious?� She said, �No�. �Okay, is he taller than me?�. She said, serious, �No�. Are there any tall strippers?
Anyway, yeah, he was maybe 5�5�. That and the chicken legs were the only unattractive things about him. He was definitely a cutie, very Italian looking (uh, yeah, Rocko, hello), and a ton of personality. That�s important. And a nice ripped body on him.
And no acne back! As a matter of fact, this guy had the smoothest, most pimple free ass I�ve ever seen. His skin was gorgeous.
Anyway, I was not into getting a lap dance. I wasn�t buzzed at all aside form being retarded from the coconut blunt, so I wasn�t feeling too uninhibited. So, lovely Andrea gets me a lap dance. I had no dollars on me when I went up to �the chair�, so he asked for the ladies to get me one. Yah. I got three. Andrea buried on right down into my bra. I buried one too. As did Rocko.
Cuz, at that point, I�m fucking going with it. I smacked his smooth little ass and yes I ran my hands all over his nice chest. And, yeah, he saw titty getting those bills. So it was fun. I think I surprised Andrea with exactly how piggy I got after being so reluctant.
It was fun. Much needed. Now today is another busy day. I�m getting my nephew and his bro (I should just call him my nephew too, even though there�s no blood relation) for a few hours. Then Andrea and Willy are coming over with their snowmobile. Hub plans a fire too. We�re also trying to dig up Rayanne and HotDaddy, and I�m going to invite Nina and her boyfriend, too. Just a nice little fun afternoon. 20 packs are currently out on the porch, in the snow, chillin�.
Okay, I feel a little better after the U2 ticket debacle. I called my sister in law Lily, as I heard she has a ticket connect person, so she�s gonna work on that for me. I am going to that fucking show, even if I have to suck someone�s dick for it. Preferably Bono�s, but I�ll settle for a roadie.
Okay, time for me to shower up. Sayonara!!!