Overcoming Obstacles
The other night at Weight Watchers, the subject of the meeting was obstacles to following the program. Anyone who�s ever been on any kind of diet knows they�re out there, in great abundance.
As usual, I half paid attention, because paying full attention to the whole meeting kills me. It�s not Weight Watchers, it�s me. This is one of the reasons why I�m convinced that I have ADD. I�m good for a few minutes, and then I�m off in left field. Looking at the other people there (�Hm, she gained that weight back?�, �Wow, he�s doing awesome�), thinking about what I�m going to do after the meeting, or how hungry I am (I never eat supper before the meeting, I always have a gain when I do), or the latest fuck up of Hub, whatever. I�m gone. I�ll return and hear something that�s said and be like, How the hell did I miss the beginning of this, it sounds interesting now.
(This is how I went through school, btw. In junior high, there was construction nearby and I spent 8th grade watching a building go up in French class. Yup. I�m French, and only know swears, a few insults, names for food and one or two greetings. I�m as fluent in French as I am in Spanish. I took Spanish too, in tenth grade, but spent most of that year pining away for Andy, the punk rock kid who sat next to me. But I never got diagnosed with ADD, even though my report cards were always filled with comments of �daydreams too much� from like first grade).
Anyway, somehow or another, the gist of the meeting got through to me. I realized this yesterday when Andrea�s grandmother dropped the kids off and brought with her a ton of baked goods. She hits a local supermarket, Sh@w�s (where I do not shop ever because that place is way expensive) several times a week and gets all the day old shit and gives it away all over the place. The shelters, soup kitchens, her family (which is huge, being that they are French-er than me) and us. This has not been easy for me, especially after smoking weed.
Sh@w�s bakery rocks. Their cookies are to die for. Holy shit. Especially the sugar cookies. I could eat the whole bag. I am powerless against them. They are the best cookies in the whole world, bar none. I have discovered that cookies are definitely a weakness of mine and I try to only buy the ones that I don�t like, like 0re0�s.
Anyway, in comes Memere with a ton of shit from Sh@w�s, including the sugar cookies, a bunch of Entem@nn�s stuff, whoopee pies (there�s another weakness) and bread. The bread doesn�t bother me. I can give or take it. But I saw those cookies and thought, �That�s it, I�m done for�.
And then the �overcoming obstacles� talk pops into my head. And I think, how can I get around this?
No sooner did I think that, then in comes Butthead, just in from getting his license. I handed him the bag of cookies and said, �I know this will go against everything I�ve been telling you about bringing food downstairs, but I need you to take these down to your room and eat them all. I don�t even care about crumbs and shit. Just get these out of my face�. He was happy to help. In the course of the afternoon, a few other goodies went down there, too.
Then, I was going to Nina�s and thought, Hey, I�ll bring some of this shit over there! Nina doesn�t need to worry about her weight (skinny bitch has had three kids and still looks just like she did at 16, with not even one stretch mark. Bitch!), she�s got two boys and that boyfriend of her�s with his sweet tooth.
I ended up with only a thing of �hot cross buns�, cheese filled crumb cake and some bread. Not bad, huh?
Now, my willpower was not totally successful, in that I did have a piece of the cheese filled crumb cake. But overall, I�m pretty impressed at how well I handled a potential disaster. Especially the cookies. If I can find a way to resist them, then I�ve made major strides in my endless battle against the bulge.
Think outside the box. I hate to let the boys have food in their rooms. Not as much Butthead, who is very neat and clean. Beavis, as we all know, is a disgusting slob and would have a mold garden down there. But, when Easter rolls around, they will all be allowed to bring their candy to their rooms. I would rather bitch about the candy wrappers everywhere than chow down on chocolate bunnies and marshmallow peeps. Same goes with Halloween.
I still haven�t eaten breakfast, and my stomach is not just growling but HOWLING. I�ve a rumbly in my tummy.
Off I go.
Ciao!!!