"It's gone, daddy, gone, the love is gone away"
Here�s my plan: My kids are going to grow up. I�m going to get old, and my uterus is going to shrivel up. Sometime in between the kids growing up and me getting old, there will be a divorce. There will be no second marriage for this chick. I�m going to buy my own little home somewhere and live alone. I�ll get a nice little job somewhere and my life will consist of working, drinking and living alone. And I�m going to find a bar to be a regular at, make a bunch of dirt bag friends and basically spend the rest of my life like this. I�m going to be the old lady at the bar. That�s it. And I can�t fucking wait. Finally, I will have some control over my home and my life.
If my kids are fuck-ups and need help raising their kids, they will be SOL as far as Grandma is concerned. Their fucking fathers can deal with the grandkids. The only plan I have for my grandkids is spoiling them and buying them obnoxiously loud and irritating toys and lots and lots of candy. I will also teach them swears and shit. Then I will send them home.
I hate my life today. I hate my husband and his kid and I hate that they treat me like I�m �just a bitch�. And it just amazes me how he can find money for shit HE �needs� when we have no money, but he can�t spend a buck on a fucking Mother�s Day card. Of course, the fact that his debit card is cracked and not working at the moment and the fact that I hid all his checks on him might have had something to do with the no money situation but still. He can raid the fuck out of the coinage in our room (which, he never put away from his little shit fit the other day) for Dunkins every stinking day, that�s no problem.
Yeah, I�m not usually such a spoiled brat but I fucking do more than my fucking share around here and I can�t even get any appreciation on goddamned Mother�s fucking Day. Like for a minute or so. No appreciation, and they still don�t fucking listen to a word I say.
And Hub will be the first one in shock when I fucking leave his ass.
And this weekend, if Dick does take the kids, I�m fucking out, yo. Hub is on his own with Daisy. If I don�t have any kids, even for a few hours, I�m abstaining myself from all responsibility and hitting the fucking bar or something. Fucking see ya.
Anyway, enough of my bitching. Did you see yesterday�s entry yet, weekday people? I gave a brief rundown of the visit with Dick at the park on Friday. And a bunch of other shit, too.
Here�s a meme I stole from MozAngeles .
01. What is the geekiest part of your music collection?
I own a Matchbox 20 CD, �Yourself or Someone Like You�. And I love it.
02. What do you eat when you raid the fridge late at night?
It�s not always the fridge. I usually hit the Pop Tarts, cookies or Cheez-its.
03. What is your secret guaranteed weeping movie?
I�m drawing a blank. �ET� will make me cry every single time.
04. If you could have plastic surgery, what would you have done?
Tummy tuck! A little lipo! And some cosmetic dentistry.
05. Do you have a completely irrational fear?
Heights. Which I wouldn�t say it�s irrational. If you fall from something really high up (like a ferris wheel), you�ll be hurt but good. So what is irrational about that?
06. Do you have too many love interests?
I so wish. I have lots of pretend celebrity boyfriends, if that counts. Lately, the list includes that little fucker Bam Margera, Ron Livingston, Kal Penn, and X-hibit from �Pimp My Ride� because I fucking love his laugh.
07. Do you know anyone famous?
Not like a friend or anything, but I�ve met briefly with a few celebs. I spoke to Beck back in 1994 after a show (and he is like wicked, wicked short, man! But totally cool), when I lived in Jamestown NY, I met Natalie Merchant a few times, and the rest of the old 10,000 Maniacs, including a lot of hanging out at The Keg Room with Rob Buck, the guitar player, and once seeing De La Soul at Avalon in Boston, Smokey and I said hi to Pos de Nos (sp?) and Dove ( I think that�s his name).Oh and when I was like 3, my parents rented a camp right next door to Lenny from Sha-na-na and we hung out with him a lot.
08. Describe your bed:
Queen size, kinda new, animal print covers. And the other night, I fell asleep with a full beer in my hand, so now it smells like old beer. Cuz I dumped it. Oops.
09. Who would play you in a movie?
Janeane Garofalo.
10. Do you know how to play poker?
Not at all.
11. What do you carry with you at all times?
Keys, camera, phone, ID, blistex, debit card!
12. Are you happy with your given name?
How can one not be happy with a cool name like Jacqueline?
13. If you could only fulfill one of your fantasies, which would it be?
I like that one about Prince Charming suddenly appearing on his white horse to scoop me up and take me away. I know I�m married, but he�s not Prince Charming. And he broke his horse�s back a while ago.
14. What was the last song you were listening to?
Red Hot Chili Peppers. WTF is the name of this one? �Is the city I live in, the city of angels, lonely as I am, together we cry�? Why can I not think of the damn name of this? Everyone knows this song!
15. Have you ever been in love?
A few times. It always ends up shitty for me. I think I confuse my heart with my crotch and it tends to cloud my ability to make wise choices.
16. Do you talk a lot?
Eh. Not really. Unless I�m pissed off or drinking.
17. Do you consider yourself to be a nice person?
Yeah. Too nice, I think. I wish I could be a little more of an asshole.
18. Do you spend more time with your girlfriend/boyfriend or your friends?
Well, I wish I had a girlfriend/boyfriend. But, I spend more time with my husband than my friends, I guess. Neither is very much, anyway. I spend most of my time with my kids.
19. Favorite fabric?
Denim.
20. Something you love and hate?
Love my kids. Hate my husband. (Maybe I picked a bad day to do this one. I seem to have a lot of resentment for the old man, no?)
21. What's the one language you want to learn?
Espanol!!! I would kill for 6 weeks of total immersion down in Mexico.
22. Do you have tattoos?
No.
23. What is your drug of choice?
Marijuana, baby!
24. What's one trait you hate in a person?
Self centered selfishness.
25. What was your most frivolous purchase?
Clothes? I�m not the one in the home that makes frivolous purchases. One guess on who is.
26. Do you consider yourself materialistic?
No. I like nice stuff, but it�s not that important for me to have it. And I don�t care what kind of car another person drives, or how much money they have, or whether or not I have what the neighbors have.
27. Do you prefer to stand out or blend in?
Blend in!
28. What kind of books do you like to read?
Thrillers, mysteries, conspiracies.
29. If you won the lottery, what would you do?
Buy a house. Put money away for kids� college. Invest. Go on a fucking vacation.
30. Burial or cremation?
I�m so torn on this one. I still don�t know. Cremation sounds good so I won�t be all rotting in my coffin, but they BURN you, man! They burn the fucking shit out of you until you�re nothing but ashes!
31. How many drinks before you're tipsy?
On an empty stomach (my preferred method), two. Otherwise, three or four.