Winooski and Stuff

The big, huge news of the day: SNOW! For those of you who live in the Northeast and watch tv, commiserate with me now. What the fuck? We got a whole inch and a half last night, and while I am aware that we're due for more, the media was going ballistic last night. STORM CENTER 2003. Thank goodness they're there to get all these people riled up enough to clog the fucking grocery stores up and raid the shelves bare. Because, after all, we're going to be snowed in for a day or two and we might run out of hamburger or soup! I'm so happy for Noggin, no NOR'EASTER 2003 bulletins. All I know is, I'm glad for the snow. I got the grocery shopping out of the way last night (but very little hamburger and soup, as all the panic stricken "we're gonna be snowed in forever" folks took all that), I bought two bottles of wine, I got a bag of weed and I'm all set to be snowed in forever. Or at least until Monday morning.

I had to take a short break to get the kiddos dressed to go outside. I surmise that I'll be taking another break shortly to undress them when they come in, as my little ones hate the cold as much as I do. Beavis will stay out for hours, always has, but the little ones just aren't that tolerant of the cold.

So. I took Monday off for a mental health day. The snow did bite me in the ass Tuesday, as my normal 30 minute turned into 2 hours because of an unexpected snow squall. The first snow of the year seems to turn people into morons, they forget that when there's snow and ice on the ground, you must be careful driving. I felt like I was in a snow storm in South Carolina. Anyway, I was out Monday, late Tuesday. Then, the kicker.

Monday night my husband got a call from his sister, "Tina". (An aside: my husband is one of 10 kids. 3 different dads. Tina is his only full-blooded sibling). Their father died. This was a man who did not see his only 2 kids after he and Millie divorced when Hubby was about 6 or 7 years old. Hubby briefly met with him again when he was 18 or 19 and actually lived with him for a month or so, but that ended ugly and Hubby basically disowned the man. Never looked back, never had any desire to know him again. Hubby considers Millie's 4th husband his father as this man was there for him growing up. And he is a good man, what he's doing with Millie is beyond my comprehension, but that's neither here nor there. Hubby's bio-dad, I'll just call him "Senior" as Hubby is a Jr, has the same name and all, came down to visit Tina two weeks before he died, and Hubby was invited, but he refused to go. I considered going with his son and youngest daughter, but didn't. Now I feel bad not going. But, I can't change that. He died Monday and Tina called and asked Hubby to please go to the funeral Wednesday. Hubby said he'd go out of respect for her.

Hubby's father did not live near us. Not even close. He lived in the Burlington, Vermont area. The funeral was in Winooski, Vt, which is right outside of Burlington. According to Yahoo! Maps, a 3 hour and 47 minute drive from where I live. Yikes. I tried to fight going, tried to get Hubby to go with Tina, but he wouldn't. It was either I go or he went alone. Fortunately, the Head Honcho at work, who's been in a good mood since returning from vacation a few weeks ago, was sympathetic. She said that father-in-laws are covered under bereavement in the policies and gave me my three days, even though I only took one for the funeral. I got paid for my mental health day, too, and an extra day!

So. We woke up at 3:30 am Wednesday and headed out for Winooski at 4:30 am. What a ride. 3 hours 30 minutes if you do 75 mph and stop once to pee. People from Vermont, please don't be offended, but I had this generalization in my head that you're all back woods hicks. Hubby perpetuated my belief by claiming that his father's family were drunk hicks. Besides, I've only been to Vermont once, and everyone I met from there seemed somewhat hicky (like, for example, Hubby's family). Imagine my surprise when I discovered that Winooski (by the name, I pictured a town out of "Coal Miner's Daughter") is a cute town. They've got COLLEGES there, institutions of higher learning! They know who Eminem is! And the people? I'm so sorry for my misled generalizations. Not much different than where I'm from only with a funny accent. (What's 8 plus 1? "Noine". You can't have that, it's "moine". Make sure you're on "toime").

Hubby has six aunts who haven't seen him since he was a little boy. Plus a shitload of cousins. Strong genes on Senior's side of the family, I could pick out his relatives on sight. One cousin looked so much like Hub I couldn't get over it. Hub is a carbon copy of Senior. At least as far as looks go, as a person he is completely different. Seeing Hub's name on the door to the funeral parlor was a bit freaky, as they didn't have room up there for the "Sr".

Here's what's sad. Guys, if you have kids that you're out of touch with, you might want to pay special attention to this. Even after his death, Hubby felt nothing towards Senior. When the family first went into the funeral parlor and saw Senior in the casket, they were all crying and upset. I had to drag Hubby to the casket to see him, and it was so obvious, Hub felt nothing. Nothing! If anything, a faint hint of distaste was on his face when he looked down at Senior. Sad. And the only one to blame is Senior himself. How did my husband feel when he heard the aunts talking about how Senior and his second wife had a houseful of foster kids all the time? You had time for foster kids, but not your own? That irked me a little and took away some of the sympathy that I felt for Senior away. I don't know the whole story, I hate being so judgemental, but it struck a cord with me.

I lost my mom when I was 11. My grandfather died when I was 13 and I was on bad terms with him when he died, and I never had a chance to rectify that. It affected me greatly to this day. Life is short and anyone can go at anytime. What's the most important thing in life? The people in it. Your family, your mom, your dad, brothers and sisters, and most of all, your kids.

Hubby and I don't have any children together and we never will. He stays in his kids lives regardless of how he feels about their mothers. And trust me The Douchebag has made it very difficult sometimes, but he won't abandon the daughter he has with her, no matter how much of a cunt she is. My oldest has a separate father than my two little ones. Neither are in their kid's lives. Beavis's father lives about 12 hours away from us by car. He briefly resurfaced in Beavis's life 2 years ago and then promptly disappeared, just stopped answering Beavis's IM's and emails. Prick. The little ones' father is just a loser. He lives in town. He's too busy drinking and smoking crack. He now owes over $10,000 in child support (get this, I pay twice as much in daycare a week as he was ordered to pay in child support. Somehow or another, I can pay that, and I make considerably less than he does,but he just can't afford to help support his children). Look for him on the 10 most wanted Deadbeat Dad list next year. But he talks about the kids to mutual "friends" like he loves them, but he hasn't laid eyes on them in over a year. Guess what they call Hubby? "Daddy". And they started calling him that on their own. Daughter asked me a few weeks ago, "Remember when I used to call Daddy {his first name}?" and I said, "Yes. Why did you start calling him Daddy?" then she looked at me and said, "Cuz he's my daddy" all matter of fact. She's no dummy. Hubby is their daddy. He loves them as much as his own. He wants to adopt them. Three kids of his own and he's taken mine on with no problem. That's a daddy. Those pieces of shit that spit the seeds? Sperm donors. They'll be lucky if these kids even show up for their funerals. They might even get a look of distaste from the kids, if the kids even feel anything. I don't care how tough things get, I don't care what my kids do, I will be in their lives until the end. Period. That's the most important thing. I want them to feel my love even long after I'm gone.

One more little comment on an unrelated subject. What the fuck is this new thing this year with certain radio stations playing ONLY Christmas music until Christmas? Two stations that I listen to at home, the R&B station and the Oldie's station, are pulling this crap. I enjoy the Christmas songs placed in with regular tunes, not fuckin' 24-7 Christmas tuneage. Now I have to listen to the Hip-hop station that plays the same songs over and over and too damn close together. Even that's more bearable than the Christmas tune situation. Whoever had that idea needs a bitch slap. I hope it's a big failure so it doesn't happen again next year.

Anyhow, I'm Audi. Saab.

Listening to:

Currently reading:

Thinking about: