Salvation � la mode and a cup of tea

Tell me. Am I the only one? Who, upon hearing the new artist Aqualung, can only think, �Snot running down his nose�? Seriously, the Aqualung in the song by Jethro Tull was a pretty creepy guy. Never mind the snot, the greasy fingers and the shabby clothes, wasn�t he lusting after young girls in frilly panties? I wonder If the singer Aqualung is aware of this? How can he not be?

Anyway, it just kinda makes me chuckle. �I think I�ll name myself after a song about a child molester�.

I went to see Jethro Tull play in 1993 at Great Woods in Mansfield , MA. Procol Harum opened up. Except. I drank way too much and ended up leaving the show before Jethro Tull came on. Great Woods (which is now the Tweeter Center or something, I can�t keep track) is a shitty venue. Lawn seats. Fuck. I hated it, and people are stupid. So, I actually did NOT see them play but I did hear them. And I ate two sausage and green pepper subs, which were delish-lish, btw.

Like sausage and green pepper subs can be bad. It�s like pizza and sex, even when it�s bad, it�s still kinda good. Which, actually, that shit�s not really true, either. I�ve had pizza that sucked royal ass and bad sex can be really bad. Like, �wtf, you�re hurting me� bad. Like, �wtf did you just call me?� bad. And burnt sausage and wilty over-cooked peppers can suck too. So just forget I said that.

Tonight marks my return to Weight Watchers. I haven�t been since November. That scale is not going to be nice to me, and I�ll deserve whatever humungous number it spits out at me. Forgive me scale, for I have sinned. My last weigh-in was two months ago. I have eaten candy, cookies, chips and dip, popcorn with tons of salt and oil, bacon (let�s talk about bacon for a minute. Is that not the world�s most perfect food? Not perfect like nutritious, but perfect like, YUM! What else can I eat this with?!?), Chinese food, pizza, brownies, and fried chicken. To name a few.

So, in all honesty, I think the scale will have me between 15-20 pounds over goal. Moo! I�m guesstimating higher than what I really think (15 lbs), just so that I�m not devastated when I see that number. If it�s higher than that, well, I don�t know what I�m gonna do. Eat a nice big fat steak or something. I kid.

I�ve actually been much better the past week and a half. Eating my veggies, drinking my water, not being a big fat glutton, etc. So, it won�t be as high as it would have a week or so ago. And I know it�s come down because clothes that did not fit two weeks ago now fit better. And by �fit�, I mean, I am able to get them on my body without zippers or buttons popping out under pressure from my gigantic girth. I don�t mean that they look nice and I haven�t got any muffin tops or spare tire-age hanging around.

Anyway, my friend Gina is going, too. She is one of the friends that I started WW with three years ago. She dropped out after like 6 months of going and not following the program. She called last week because she and her daughter were starting up again. I didn�t go on account of NO MONEY!, but told her I�m going this week. Hopefully, she�s serious, which she said she Is, and we can stick to It together. I can�t keep up this way. I hate the spare tire, and the fat on my ass and thighs that I can feel, for crying out loud, and mostly? I hate the closet full of clothes that I can�t wear because they look like shit on me.

I actually did buy some new clothes last weekend, with a gift card that Beavis got me for Christmas. I had to spend it before I spent it on something retarded like food or the kids. It was a Simon Mall gift card that is a Visa debit, so it could be spent anywhere. I chose Old Navy. I actually went in looking for one of those corduroy blazers, but they had none. So, instead, I got a cute top, one of those empire waisted things, with beading on it, short-sleeved with a very low neckline. A boobie shirt. Hey, I might have a spare tire, but the twins still look good, If I do say so myself. I also got a pair of off-white pants to match, and two pairs of flip-flops, because I love flip-flops and I can never have too many, no matter what my husband says.

My head hurts, and I�m pretty sure I have some shit to get done around here. So, with that, I�ll end this lame entry.

Talk amongst yourselves.

Listening to: Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Again.

Currently reading: "Motherless Daughters" Hope Edelman

Thinking about: Ibuprofen.