See You Next Tuesday! (as in, c-u...)

I didn't kill myself. However, my eys still look like I did some major crying and it's been over 12 hours since I was.

It was reiterated to me last night, through his behavior, that my husband is of no comfort to me whatsoever. He had no sympathy for my feelings at all.

All I have to say about that is, thank God I have my dland friends. Thank you all for your support and offering me those comments. You all outshined my husband by leaps and bounds. Can I marry my buddy list instead?

Anyway. I spent the past two hours writing this. I've changed nothing, so there's no nicknames. Remember, Brendan=Beavis, Brandon=Cornholio.

Please let me know if I sound reasonable, or if I sound like a "problem" in the nighborhood. I need feedback as I plan on giving this to her, and don't want to sound like a retard.

"1/21/06

Julie,

I am writing this letter in an attempt to communicate my side of this �debacle� with you peacefully, without having my son or myself further libeled in the HLN. I do not recall even mentioning you in the ones I sent in, for your information. And after you told my step-son that it was �okay� to ride by your house, �just watch out for the kids�, I was a bit surprised to see them.

I believe it�s noteworthy to begin this by stating that after moving here in July 2002, I never had any idea who you were at all. That is, until well after the Awalts moved in in May or June of 2003, after Brendan had become friends with Brandon. I�d never heard your name at all until late 2003 or early 2004 (sorry, I�m not certain exactly when), after hearing from Brendan about your repeated harassment and screaming at him when he was down there.

Since I�d never heard from you at all personally regarding any concerns about his behavior, if there in fact was a problem, I wasn�t aware of it at all.

Also, I try very hard not to react to anything based solely upon information from the kids in this neighborhood. Some of them have a tendency to perpetuate drama and false rumors in the neighborhood, and cause problems when their parents aren�t watching, which, from my end of the neighborhood, has been a problem.

If the kids in the neighborhood are to believed, the rumors circulating around the neighborhood from the kids (Jimmy, Kaili and the older kids) in the summer of 2004 involving yourself and �Uncle Scott�, while your husband was away (in Iraq?), were quite interesting. Also interesting were the rumors that Scott had to leave because he was also sleeping with Kara.

Just so you know, I choose not to believe these rumors based upon their sources.

My solution to this has been not to get involved in the neighborhood drama with them. Last June, when the kids were up here talking about the scene with you and Brendan, I did not comment to them about the situation and told them that I would not discuss it with them.

If I find a child in my yard, who is unattended by their parents (who I barely know), and is misbehaving, being destructive or being just plain rotten to my children, as has happened many, many times, it is my choice to ask them to leave my yard. I have no obligation or responsibility for these children and if they can�t behave, they cannot be here. I do not �banish� kids from my yard and make it a standing rule that they are not allowed in at all. They are �allowed� back in, but will be asked to leave again if they continue on with unacceptable behavior.

I suppose I could be an old biddy and report all of these issues with the parents. However, in doing so, I am faced with two problems. Number one, I would be at the doors of other parents almost every day. Number two, I have found in my 14 years of experience being a mother, that people who don�t watch their children and allow them to roam unattended for long periods of time are not receptive to being told of their child�s behavior problems and often deny it. (I have found this to be very true of Karl especially) .

Also, my role as a neighbor does not give me the right to tell people how to raise their children.

As far as Matthew being �kicked out� of my yard. Yes, he was asked to leave in the spring of 2004. My own �small children� were 3 and 5 at the time, and Matthew was, what? 8? 9? Anyway, his visits into my yard often found him picking on my younger children, calling names and arguing with them. He was asked to leave for that. Also? I was rather disturbed to see him urinating in my front yard one afternoon, and he was asked to leave, then, too.

As far as him being �permanently banished� from the yard, as I heard from Jimmy earlier last year, I can only assume this came from the kids. Never once was I asked about it by you.

And to address the issue of �foul language�. One of the benefits of being outside and watching these kids (without their parents in sight) is that I see a lot of behavior that the parents do not. In the times that Matthew was in my yard, I recall hearing a choice word or two out of his mouth. Jimmy�s mouth is incredibly foul for his age, and I�ve heard him say just about every obscenity. That�s who your son plays with. Kaili taught my �small� daughter about �bi-sexuals� last spring.

However, if I addressed that to Karl, I�d have been met with self-righteous indignation.

It is NOT okay for him to scream in Brendan�s face. I have never screamed in any of the faces of the kids around here, nor would I. We accepted their son into our home on many, many occasions and were nothing but respectful to him. And Brandon is far more of a behavior problem than Brendan. Brendan has never been suspended from school for fighting or ANYTHING. I never held Brandon�s behavior against him, I treated him with respect and we never had a problem with his behavior at all.

Also, I was wondering how, other than having a teenage boy who likes to ride a snowmobile or lawn mower and just plain likes to enjoy himself, I have been such a problem in this neighborhood. I�ve been up here on this hill keeping to myself. I haven�t encouraged my kids to beat up other kids in the neighborhood (as Karl stood in front of our house and commanded Jimmy to beat up Eric right in front of Eric�s uncle), I haven�t called an 8 year old girl a bitch (again, Karl did) nor have I shown up at any one�s house screaming like a lunatic. I haven�t been on the phone harassing anyone around here, nor have I called the police for ridiculous reasons, like teenagers walking up and down the driveway while they were talking. (I was outside that night, and there was no �noise problem� to be heard).

For example, the Tate�s on the other side of us have quite a few mini-bikes and ATVs. There have been a few times that they have been on them quite late and the noise disturbed us. Rather than calling the police, we have gone over and politely asked them to stop, and they have.

I�ll be honest, I did not know that anyone down at your end was concerned about the little kids around the snowmobile until a woman from Pater called me and explained. (Since I am outside with my younger kids often, I keep an eye on them when they snowmobile is out). I was very receptive to her concerns and as you have seen, they have not taken the snowmobile out at all since. Contrary to what you might believe, I am a very reasonable person. However, I cannot be reasonable if I am not aware. As far as riding on your lawns, that, also, I was not aware of.

As far as the �swearing at adults�, I�m sorry, but I cannot blame Brendan for swearing at Karl. He was screaming in his face like a raging crackhead, which I suspect he might be. As far as what happened last spring, it is my understanding that Brendan apologized to you for it. He apologized, and the incident needs to be let go. Also, he was reprimanded for what he called you that same day, after I found out because HE told me.

Your call to try to be �friends� that evening came too late. I was very angry about everything that had been going on between yourself and the Awalts for the previous two years. I was in no condition to reason at that time. I apologize for that, but it was in my interest at that time to avoid a scene, which would have happened.

Regarding your �Thumbs�, I�d like to address a few points:

The police know �how� my son is? Really? Is that based solely upon your information to them? Because he hasn�t had any run-ins with the police, whatsoever.

He has respect for those who treat him with respect. It�s not an automatic given that everyone deserves respect. I have taught him to respect adults and he does. However, maybe he has become confused by being screamed at repeatedly and then pulled in the other direction with requests to be �friends� from the same person?

I also pay good money to live here. Am I to assume that your money is better than mine?

Brendan is picking on the smaller children? Which ones? Aggravating his neighbors? Really? I am not aware of these instances. Has he been over at your house ringing the doorbell at 8:00am or on Christmas? It seems like aggravating the neighbors is very common in this neighborhood. Fortunately, a large part of the �aggravating� crew has just moved out.

Also? Karl screamed at Brendan not over the snowmobile, but because he and my husband told the police that they thought you called them. Which, we found out later, was not true.

Also? The police did not tell my husband or Brendan to stop riding, they told them that they couldn�t do anything about them riding because it is a private driveway. (An aside, I was in my house that evening and did not speak to the police or Karl. That was my husband�s doing. I cannot control everything he says and does and I do not attempt to. Nor do I accept responsibility for his behavior).

I don�t what kind of problem I was to the Awalt�s, aside from having Brandon sleep over almost every weekend and putting up with drama and crap from Jimmy and Kaili for the past two and a half years. I won�t be writing to them, because thankfully they have moved and I choose not to involve in their skewed view of reality.

Also, I did not know how I am a problem to the new people in 95. The only time I ever spoke to them was when they called to request plowing. Then, when they were plowed following their request, they did not want to be plowed. Is that the problem? Because, otherwise, I do not know these people from a hole in the wall. Nor am I interested to.

However, you and I remain here and I�d just like you to know my side of the story. Also, a very close longtime friend of mine has applied for the apartment next door to you, and imagine what that would be like if they do get accepted.

That is my side of the story. Respond if you wish to, or not. I�ve said my peace.

Jackie"

Listening to: Pearl Jam. "Mumble mumble mumble"

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