"The new phone book's here! The new phone book's here!"
Well, five days with no update is enough. My days have been so �full� this week, I just haven�t had time.
Best way to get a phone call out of Jackie (if you�re a member of my family): neglect to tell her that her uncle Ray (dad�s sister�s husband) passed away on Monday and let her see the obituary on Wednesday in the newspaper. Thanks a fucking lot, people. Quite reminiscent of the time, in early 2003, that my great uncle Marcel died, and I found out the same way, reading the paper, and that time it was precisely as his wake was starting.
Hub�s family is ten times worse than mine, but he gets a phone call when any of them fucking sneeze, for crying out loud.
I wasn�t too close to this uncle, not as much as I am to my aunt, but still, I�ve known the guy for like 25 years. He was really kinda cool. He was a representative for Random House books for years and got all kinds of free books and he knew a lot of authors personally, most notably Julia Child. When he retired in 1992, they actually made a book about him for his party, and authors and employees of Random House wrote all kinds of stories about working with him.
He was in the Navy on the USS Missouri. When his son, Trent, who is a few years younger than me and totally HOT (he�s a step-cousin, okay, and it�s just an observation, but really, he�s smoking), joined the navy a few years back (okay, it could�ve been like ten years ago), Uncle Ray was so proud. And then he re-enlisted! Trent was friends with my brother for years, and acted like him *slightly*, so the turnaround was quite an improvement.
Ray came quite close to dying a few times before, back in the mid to late 80�s he had some kind of lung thing going on and came out of it.
He was half of my family�s liberal team. At family get-togethers, there were four primary political folks, Uncle Ray and Uncle Tony on the liberal side, my dad and cousin Russ on the conservative side. Very entertaining discussions, the best part of them being Uncle Ray getting exasperated and saying �Jesus CHRIST!� or �god-DAMMIT!�.
Don�t worry, I�m prepared to take his place.
Anyway, yeah, that�s the news for today.
In financial news, things are starting to not suck as much. Hub started saying last night that things were �getting better� and I corrected him by saying they �don�t suck as much�. I hate to jinx this shit. Especially after the last three months.
Hub�s starting a big job, walls, waterfalls, etc. It�s the most expensive job we�ve taken on, and I pray that he doesn�t fuck it up. It just doesn�t make sense to sit around anymore waiting for fucking snow. Ain�t gonna happen, and if in fact it does, it won�t last. He�s probably not even going to need the fucking jackhammer since the ground is nice and soft (it�s so soft around here, it may as well be fucking quicksand, I swear. Mud season!).
So, that, and all of a sudden child support is rolling in. Finally got Rod�s Monday. Dick is in major catch up mode. I think I might have talked some sense into him, that, and the whole �chance of going to jail� thing, have likely changed the situation, at least for a little while.
Tim, the CSO, told him if we could reach an agreement, he could probably get the capias dropped. At first I was like, No. And of course, Hub was like no. Not that it�s up to him, but, you know. But I thought about it and it�s like this. If Dick goes to jail, no one is bailing him out. His dad, while he certainly has the means to do so, wouldn�t. And other than that? Well, he�s got sisters all over the country that he doesn�t talk to and no other family. And he�s burned every damn bridge that he�s ever been over except mine. (Trust me, if things keep up like this, if he ever needs a �next of kin�, you know that shit will fall on me if the kids are still young).
So, if they arrest him, he just goes to jail indefinitely until they feel bad enough for him to let him out. That doesn�t serve any purpose, does it? Or, he could stay out of jail and I could get some money for the kids (who are going to need spring and summer clothes soon, besides that whole �eating� and �living under my roof� thing that they have going on) for a while, anyway.
So, I signed his agreement, to pay me $800 (in four installments) by the end of the month. So far, he�s paid $200, so he�s off to a good start. And, supposedly, he�s going to see the kids this weekend. So, he�s doing better for now.
My weekend, now that we�re halfway to another one, was wonderful. No extra kids. No step kids except for Butthead, who�s truck is now back on the road and is rarely sighted around here anyway. And Beavis spent Friday and Saturday nights at Shawn�s, which fucking ruled. The teen angst �my problems are soooooo huge, please stop everything now and mope with meeeeeeee, you�re not doing enough for me��what have you done for ME lately???� bullshit is getting on my nerves, so not having it around for two days was fucking awesome.
So, suffice it to say that only having Minnie and Mickey for the weekend was like having �no kids� after the last few weeks.
This weekend is a Daisy weekend. Yay.
So, through the power of my DVR, I am actually able to watch tv shows lately. I haven�t missed a episode of The Colbert Report for like two months. That, and The Daily Show and Real Time with Bill Maher. I even have Hub�s crap on there. He likes to watch �It Could Happen Tomorrow� on the Weather Channel because he loves that alarmist shit.
Anyway, recently added to the list is the new Real World and HBO�s polygamist show, Big Love.
I watched the previews for Big Love a billion times and finally set the DVR for it�s premiere Sunday night. It�s quite interesting. Hub watched it like a train wreck, and I could see the cogs in his little brain trying to figure out how Chet (I mean Bill Paxton, who�s character�s name is Bill on the show) can handle three wives. Three wives, seven kids and three houses. And three home improvement stores.
Meanwhile, I was watching and wondering how do you get three wives? Really. The first one I can see. But the second? How does that work? How do you get number one to agree to it, and how do you ask someone to be your second wife? That�s the shit I want to know. And never mind the third.
No big surprise at the end when we find that he went out and got a prescription for Viagra. Nothing�s shocking there.
And the Real World, holy shit! You know this season is going to have major focus on Paula. Holy crap, that poor girl. She is a mess. And, in the words of Tyler, Token Gay Guy, she could use a protein shake. Anorexia is just one of her apparent myriad of problems. Twice, TWICE so far she�s had freak outs while drunk, but then she doesn�t want to be known as the girl who goes out and gets drunk and emotional. Well guess what! You are! Hello. I really feel bad for her, honestly. She�s like, what, 24, and a total mess. WTF happened to that poor girl, ya know?
And what the hell is up with me, actually giving more than a moment�s thought about �Wow, gotta admire her will power�? I am so aware of how very wrong that thought is. Totally twisted.
Okie doke. I think that�s it for now.
Except! Just got a call from Alvirne, Butthead Is on the �absent� list today. Only he went to school this morning. Hm. Honestly, I don�t think the little bastard is skipping, but who knows. He�s been giving this girl a ride to school, she has a car but no parking sticker, so she�s parking here and he drives to school. Her car is here. I think he�s at school myself. Unless he really IS fooling around with this chick like I was accusing him of this morning, and they�re out somewhere sucking face and other stuff.
Eh. I won�t know the truth until later today anyway. Now I�m really out.
Arrividerci!