I don't even know.

I am so down on the Hub lately. Like, more than usual. It�s the listening thing. He knows, somehow or another (I don�t know, maybe he�s listening or some crazy shit like that), that I am extremely annoyed by his audio-challenged ways. So now he�s over-correcting. Any stupid remark I make, he has to make a point to hear it. It�s fucking aggravating as all hell.

He can�t win. He just can�t. He needs to face it. I�m sure there�s another woman out there who would love him to death, but he still thinks it �s me. That poor man.

Ha, I say that, then I commence trashing him. Like I said, he can�t win. He needs to give up.

He wants me to go to his counseling appointment with him on Tuesday night. I do not want to go. I tried the passive-aggressive approach, which was hoping that I�d be working until 8:30 that night, but that didn�t work. I happen to be out at 4:30 that day. WTF. So now, I either go reluctantly, or flat out tell him that I don�t want to go.

If I go, it�s going to be like I�m going to court without a lawyer while he�s there with his. I won�t get to plead my case. It�ll be all about him. He has things he wants to tell me but he wants to tell me there. Great. So it�s all about him, Hub, the center of the fucking universe.

Which is another thing that has me resentin� lately. Or maybe not just lately. Unless, by lately, I mean the past few years.

I mean fuck all the shit that I�ve been wanting to tell him but never can cuz he can�t listen to anything that might mean he�s not 100% Mr. Great Fucking Guy without blowing up and breaking shit or putting his hands on me. (Which, btw, he hasn�t done since I told him the next time he does it, he�s gone. Kicked out, restraining order, the whole nine. Serious as a fucking heart attack with that shit).

Ugh. Enough about him.

I spent this past week training for my new position as Financial Services Representative at the main branch of the credit union. I fucking loved it. Eventually, I will transfer there full time. I can�t keep doing late nights and weekends forever.

The main branch is busy. Always. It gets all the awesome problems. Loans out the wazoo. At my branch, only two people are trained in loans, and that�s only taking in apps. Now, at my last job, I did loans. Apps, processing, closings. The two people who are trained have zero experience before they worked there. So, it all seems mysterious and intimidating and difficult to them.

I saw lots of loans this week. The first closing I saw, I was like, �Um, that�s it? I can do that�. We turn so many people away at my branch cuz �nobody here can do loans�. Bullshit. Supposedly, the president of the credit union doesn�t think it�s necessary for us to do loans at our branch but if he knew how many people get turned away, it�d be a different story.

One of the loan officers I spoke to thinks it�s a shame that we don�t do more loans there and says one week of training would have us up and running. I say, Give me two days max to learn the system (which is the only thing I need to learn really) and I�m good. So I�m pushing that. I enjoy loans way more than opening accounts or fucking CD�s or any of that shite so why not.

This week I�m training for aisle sales. Or, as I like to call it, �shopping�. Sales suck. And I am going to suck at it, only because if I suck at it well enough, I will not have to do aisle sales. But the training will be fun, because I am going to be trained by Tom, one of the credit union�s financial advisors. He is a fucking hottie and a half. I�ll pretend to be excited about aisle sales but if they put me out there on my own? I�ll only be taking notes on what great deals BJ�s has on paper towels or what new books they have. LOL.

Speaking of the credit union, my own personal account has $6.66 in it right now. Yes, I�m poor, but also? 6.66. That�s just funny.

I have to shower and maybe start this day. I need to get groceries as there is no food in this house and I had chips and dip for breakfast. Healthy! I was too lazy to boil a couple of eggs. And that�s fucking lazy, man.

Listening to: Pop for kids. I have no choice. =(

Currently reading: "Cross Bones" Kathy Reichs

Thinking about: my aching head